My Greatest Goal

I am currently busy doing a lot of things. I am working hard, studying things, dancing (which I’m happy to be able to do again despite the challenges it is giving me), thinking, saving money and learning. Basically, I’m trying to be really focused on my long term goals. I am 24 and I feel I’m getting really old now and should be getting more serious in life.

I am saving and studying many things to put up a business in the future. There’s one thing that I just want to have now, though, that I don’t really have any control over. I think that I should be growing with that special girl already… that girl who I will then be marrying. Since the time I have broke up with my last girlfriend, I have tried to prepare myself for the next girl that I will be committing myself to. It has been over 2 years now since the last time I’m in a relationship and I’m kind of excited because I feel that I’m really going to love that next girl. I feel like I have a lot more knowledge now on how to deal with trials and misunderstandings. I feel like I have pondered enough and learned from my experiences that I’m ready to meet that girl now. We will argue a lot, but every after misunderstanding, we will listen and talk, determined to learn and grow together. We will hug and kiss after, as a reward for a job well done. We’re going to have a foundation of honesty, care and respect. We are going to have joys that would last a life time.

I really wish I’ll be really successful in achieving my ultimate goal. I’ll surely work hard to put up the best family in the world. I will definitely continue in preparing myself for that. I will love them. I will constantly communicate with them. And just like what I and my wife are going to do with each other, I will grow with my kids. I will try to make them feel I am there to support them in every step of the way. I will show them the best choices every time they need to decide on something. We will fight and we will argue but everything will be fixed after we talk and have a healthful conversation where we are going to have the same best purpose. We will work really hard. When the time comes they will leave our home to put up their family, I will cry but I will be happy. I am going to be proud of them because they have chosen to choose the best things. They will visit me and their mother every time they can. They will try to imitate me and their mom. They will be crying every once in a while but will be shedding tears of joy, just like their parents, for the accomplishments each of us has achieved. And when the time comes where I will be resting forever, my family will be sad. They will feel just like what I will be feeling when my kids will leave our home. They will be proud of me because I tried to be a perfect model to every person, a perfect husband, a perfect dad, and a perfect friend to my kids. They will be proud because, even though I can not, I tried my best to be a perfect person to be able to achieve my ultimate goal… to put up the greatest god-fearing happiest family I can.

I'm not daydreaming too much, am I? :)

For the mean time, I have to do a lot of sacrifices and learnings for my self. I am going to make them happen… I will try my best to… :)

So Long My Mentors

In school, or at least in my school, students are pushed to work hard. I never really want to do a lot of things especially that so exhausting thesis paper. But that was just at first. I have made myself, with the help of my teachers, get used to in doing productive things as often as possible, making my self more competitive every moment that passes.

Yesterday, I just got my final course cards in my college years. I was happy I am finally graduating. But then, I was kind of confused because I was also sad. There was actually more sadness inside me. Thinking about it this time, I believe I have finally figured it out. I got used to doing a lot of readings. I got used to in thinking of a lot of deadlines. I got used to doing a lot of researches. And now, suddenly, all of those things seem to be gone. There is a big part of me that longs for that feeling of rush again, determination to do something well again, to work hard again for something productive, and in the end, get that good grade proving my teacher we made a great team in making me better again.

It is just yesterday that school tasks are finally over for me and, surprisingly, I miss school already. I feel like I need another book review, a research paper, or do a PowerPoint Presentation for a report in front of a class. I feel like I just broke up with a girlfriend. What’s happening to me?! Oh well, it is indeed different now. I’m about to enter the school of the real world… a school without teachers to guide me.

Well, technically, I’m on my own now. But then, I prefer not to think of it that way. My teachers will still be on my thoughts, it may sound mushy as it gets. I am serious. Come on. Let me do this. :) Anyway, besides, my educators and I have not actually proven that we made a great team yet. I still have a long way to go. I guess we can not actually prove it until I reach their ages: 50’s? ;) I don’t know. But one thing is for sure, the examinations go on, just in a room where things are a lot bigger and a lot different. Surely, the learning I had in school will be in me forever. The success and teachings of Sir Melvin De Guzman will guide and encourage me to work hard and remind me that I can always count on God. The motivation and belief that Sir Robert Espiritu has shown will always be in my mind, especially when I am down, to get me going. The fundamentals of PowerPoint Presentation that have taught to me by Sir Ben Pascua will always be remembered and those skills I will surely constantly improve. The 6 inches handouts of Sir Bob Baylon will always be one of my treasures. To all teachers who believed and had that goal of really improving my self will always be considered as my inspiration to strive for success, carrying the things that they have taught me… they know who they are. They will not be giving course cards anymore but I will still have that goal of still trying to get a grade of 4 from them. But this time, on how I will apply the teachings they have inculcated in me. In the school of the real world, deadlines would be of real life, the seatwork will be in every circumstance, the assignments will come from problems of business or even of my family. There will be no teachers to scold me anymore whenever I have my shortcomings, who will give advices, who will believe, who will listen, and who will smile whenever I do something right in every step of the way. It is time to go now, but I hope I will meet them again. I hope I will be able to show them my future achievements and riches in wealth, friends, family, and even in my own students, teaching and sharing values to people inspired of what they have shown me.

To my Sir’s and Ms’s, it will be one of my goals to meet you again. I will work hard and when that time comes: I hope you will not say “You’re not doing well” (grade of 1); it will be begrudgingly okay for me if you say “You can still do more” (grade of 2); it will be just satisfactory if you say “You are okay” (grade of 3); overall all, I hope you will say “We have made a great team” (grade of 4). :) I hope I will be able to make you proud. So long my mentors, until that moment when we see each other again.

Sprained

I started my day pretty well today. I got up early and I was the second person to be in my basketball class. As soon as I got at the gym, I practiced my basketball skills and really got the hang of it. We had our midterm exam today and I was really enjoying playing basketball. The professor also showed us our grades in all of the exams. I got straight 4’s. :) After the class, I and some of my classmates had a game with some students who were watching the class. We were totally kicking their ass. For the first 5 points of our team against 2 points of the other team, I made 3 points and 2 steals. I was having a blast until that time when I tried to rebound with that team-b player. From airborne, I accidentally stepped on his foot. My right foot just slid through his foot and, going to the ground, it bent with almost all of my body weight supported by it. It was painful, of course. I literally saw my ankle ballooned. My classmates helped me go to the bench and, there, I tried to see if I can walk or not. My classmates were sorry for me and were trying to take care of me while waiting for someone from the clinic. I was actually surprised with my classmates. It was even like my second time to talk with many of these people and here they are, trying to tell me what to do, giving me a company, taking care of my things and stuff, I thought to myself. Coming to think of it, maybe that’s the reason that, even though it was my first time to be injured in my ankle, I was acting like nothing happened and optimistic about my condition. I was joking around and the next time I know, we were all smiling and joking around as if we were celebrating something. The nurse got me on a wheelchair and brought me to the clinic. A doctor soon attended to me. They asked me some questions and then put a cold compress on my ankle. They said that I have to be brought in the hospital where I can get my foot x-rayed. While waiting for the ambulance, 3 of my classmates visited me in the clinic. These are not even the people who I always talk to in class. And in fact, among the 3, the only person I know the name, is Abby. They were concerned of my situation and we were trying to figure out how I can go home with my car. Not to mention that my car is parked about 4 blocks away from where I am. Abby offered to accompany me until I found someone who can drive me home even though it will take long before I can find one. One of my cell phone numbers is running out of credits and the other number can only reach another same subscriber. Since Abby only has a Globe number, she gave me a 50 peso load so we could communicate after her class and after I get from the hospital. For some reason, the ambulance came, I think after 30 min. While waiting, my classmates were the ones who went to the cafeteria to get me my lunch. They ate with me and we were just fooling around in the clinic until the nurses put me inside the ambulance. It was my first time to be taken to the hospital in a speeding ambulance. It was kind of “cool”, you know. I feel like I’m special. In Manila Adventist Medical Center, I was surprised. The nurses and the doctors were so inhospitable. It is really surprising that I felt more at ease when I was with my classmates than in this hospital. There is only one person who was welcoming, and that was the old guy nurse who I was with only in a minute. The other nurse who x-rayed me was frowning the whole time. The first doctor who looked at my ankle even laughed when I got hurt when she pressed my swollen ankle. The next doctor who happened to pass by and see my ankle pressed my swollen ankle also and, even though it was obvious that I was hurt, he just said something like “It is nothing.” What he did might just be just ok if it is true that it just nothing. The thing is, the results were saying that there might be a broken bone and that they have to first examine the x-ray results with a radiologist to really confirm the broken bone. Now what’s the use of pressing my ankle if they are not the one who is supposed to diagnose me? Why would they laugh that way at my condition? Are these the only kinds of hospital personnel that haven’t left this country? And then there’s another doctor who showed up. He was actually the one who told me their findings. He was soft-spoken that’s why I managed to keep on smiling and keep saying thank you to let them know that I appreciate what they’re doing. He then prepared the things that will be used to cast my ankle. The doctor, who was telling me that my condition is nothing to worry about, showed up again and said “Oh no, the color of the cast that will be used on you is blue!” The clown was trying to scare me. Could you imagine?! What an asshole huh?! I just tried to act patiently by just saying “Could you just use a green cast since it’s the color of my school” smiling and ignoring the other doctor who just butt in. While this soft-spoken doctor casting my foot he have pressed my ankle and, of course, I reacted like I’m hurt because, I really got hurt. The doctor didn’t shout but with a tone of contempt said like “You relax. You relax!” He was saying that as if it was my fault for me to be hurt, man. That was the time when I can’t help it but frown. No wonder they didn’t call it a hospital… the group of people there at that time were so inhospitable. When I and the nurse from my school were about to leave they gave me my medical certificate. The date was March 1, which is supposedly March 4. I told them patiently that the date is wrong. The doctor who has a hobby of butting in, butt in again. He was like “What’s wrong? What’s wrong? It’s March 4. It’s March 4, there’s nothing wrong.” He was saying this in a tone of anger. I tried to be patient and just went out to the bed and go to the wheelchair. The doctor who cast my ankle then pointed something in the certificate showing the “butt-in” doctor what’s wrong. He gave my certificate with a corrected date. I just sat on the wheelchair, not showing any gratitude to any doctor, while the nurse, who is with me, brought me to a cab. I was supposed to go back there but I’m really having a second thought if it’s safe to do so, honestly. The cab dropped me near my car but I still have to hop using only one leg to about 4 yards to get to my car. I stayed there and just thought of the things that happened. Abby then came after an hour. I gave her 50 bucks for the load she gave me for my cell phone since I just couldn’t afford to take it for free. She was doing a lot for me. We talked for a while and I thought that since no one could really drive me home that time, I decided to try driving. She doesn’t find it a good idea, but I have made her realized it was ok. I needed crutches and I still have to get it on the seventh floor of the building just a block away. Abby offered help and got it for me. As a trial, I drove her to the building. It was not easy, but I have to try driving. It took my friend about 15 min to get the crutches from the clinic because of the things she still have to do before the clinic could lend me those. I drove her to her building after, so she could continue her class. I was really thanking her for all the help she has done. I texted her and thanked her. I asked her how I can repay her for the kindness she has done. She told me that there’s nothing she wants in return since helping me has been a pleasure for her. She was really an angel. It was a mix feeling for me going home. I was grateful yet disappointed to people. I was thankful yet felt unfortunate to what had happened. I felt alone driving for myself yet felt special after the care some people showed me. C'est la vie.